Satire
The Team That Exists in Another Timezone
They own half the integration. They are 6 hours away. Slack messages disappear into the void between 3 PM and 9 AM.
The integration requires sign-off from Team B.
Team B is in a different country.
You send the message at 2 PM your time.
What Actually Happens
They read it at 9 AM their time, which is 3 PM your time — after your day ends. They respond with a question. You see the question the next morning. You respond. They have already left for the day.
This is called collaboration. It takes four days to confirm a field name.
Meanwhile, the feature that depends on this integration is due Friday. It is Wednesday. You begin building against assumptions. The assumptions are 80% correct. The 20% that is wrong is the part that ships to production.
“I've calculated the collaboration cost. At current response latency, your effective throughput is 0.4 decisions per business day. I recommend async everything and a shared SLA.”
DivineForge Advisory
Recognise this pattern in your organisation? I help teams cut through the governance, make the right technical calls, and actually ship.
Let's talk architecture →How a Builder Should Respond
You front-load the information exchange before async latency can compound it. Write a single document that contains every question, every assumption, every contract — and send it in one message. Request one synchronous call during overlap hours to resolve ambiguity that would take days in Slack. Build against a contract, not a conversation. When distance is structural, your documentation has to be precise enough that silence doesn't cost you a sprint.
20 articles about enterprise dysfunction. None of it billable. Buy me a coffee.
Buy me a coffee